Time is flying

I cannot believe how quickly time is flying by. It seems like just a few weeks ago we were offered the job in Indiana, PA. Now, I can count the number of weeks we have left in Sugar Land on one hand. I thought there was so much I wanted to do, but really I think I would rather cultivate friendships and spend my last days with people rather than at different places.

I cannot believe that it has been almost two months since my dad has died. It just doesn't seem real most days. I think I have somehow convienced myself that it hasen't happened. The other day we were driving and I was looking around enjoying my scenery. Then, it hit me..."I need to call my dad. My dad is dead? No he's not. It was someone else. My dad is not dead. Oh wait, this is real...this happened." It really did happen.

I have learned a lot about myself through all of this. While the trials in my life seem never-ending, I want to remember that my God is never failing, always loving and worthy of all trust. I want to fix things on my own, I want to take care of myself. Yet, I have learned that I can't. It impossible to care for myself in the way that only God can. His healing power is much better than anything the world could offer me.

Jeremiah 31:3-4 says, "The LORD appeared to us in the past, saying: "I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with loving-kindness. I will build you up again and you will be rebuilt, O Virgin Israel. Again you will take up your tambourines and go out to dance with the joyful."

I am unworthy of such love, but I'm so grateful that His love is everlasting and that He promises to rebuild me. I am trusting God for a time soon when I will dance joyfully with my tambourine.