Monday, December 3, 2012

Mothering boys and such...

I am coming to learn that being a momma of boys requires more than I had previously thought.  Whether you have one boy or 12, they are so special, so unique.

And I mean that in a good way.

I never thought that I could be so quick on my toes.  A hear a scream or cry and I'm faster than lightening.  I hear a smack {because God has developed in me ultra sensitive and highly acute hearing abilities now} and off I go.  I hear "NO!" and I'm on it because I know, I just know, that there was an offensive and defensive party.  And I'm the momma, so I will figure that out.

It's in my {unofficial} job description.

Or, for example, you may be in the kitchen cleaning up from breakfast and you hear your older boy say very enthusiastically to the younger {and much less experienced} boy -- "Hey Andrew! Come with me!  Let's build a huge tower!!!!"
And when I hear those words I know, without a shadow of doubt, that what he really said was this -- "Hey you little person that does whatever I tell you to do! Come with me and I'll get us into a lot of trouble doing things that are really awesome and pretty destructive. It's so fun! Mom LOVES it!"

You really need to be prepared with an action plan when things like this go down.

But motherhood doesn't come with an action plan.  It doesn't come with instructions.  It doesn't even come with suggestions.  It's a day in and day out struggle to keep little people, who rely completely on you, alive.  If you have made it to the next day -- success! Do it again.

My methods of madness and convictions may not be the same as yours.  My disciplinable issues may not be the ones you hold as strongly. Basically, we are all just getting by -- and there is no room for fussing and fighting about it (insert Beatles song here}.

Motherhood is a sisterhood, I tell you!
{Quick! Someone make a cute pinterest thing about that!}

I pray every day that God would show me how to love my boys, discipline my boys and give them what they need.  They are so different from each other, and from me.  I have NO clue how they work {okay, I have no clue how I work either}.  I have NO idea why the don't think before they speak or consider the danger in the actions they are about to proceed with.  No clue.  Boys are clueless to me.  And how do I love them well?  How do I teach them well?  How to I allow them to mess up and learn lessons on their own?  When do I step in and break up a fight?  When do I throw all caution to the wind and grab them and hold them and kiss them until they can't breathe from laughing so hard?

Wait.  I know the answer to the last one.  Always and often.

And now, after just a mere three years and eight months of motherhood, I'm more clueless and humbled than when I started.  I thought then that I could do it and be awesome.  I know now that is nearly impossible.  I am only who I am because of Christ in me.

Amazed at my early morning cheerfulness?  That's Jesus.
Impressed at my daily endurance?  Jesus.
What? I cook almost all of our meals and love it? God made me that way.
I enjoy cleaning!? Stop it! No, it's true.  God made me that way, too.
You think I'm strong? That's the power of Christ.  I am nothing without Him.  I am empty and weak and weary and helpless.  True story.

And so today, I'm so grateful that even though I am nothing on my own and that having boys is beyond my comprehension and that I get more than confused by my job requirements, it's not about me.  It's about letting God move through me so I can bring glory to Him.  It's about letting God teach me and mold me and sanctify me through motherhood -- and oh boy, does He use this well!

These days are about prayer -- constant prayer and on my knees prayers. These days are about loving these sweet treasures I've been given, not with what I have -- but with what I've been given through Jesus.  I can love with grace and patience and joy and wisdom and strength because of an Almighty God.

And I'm so glad it's not about me or what I have to offer!

And I'm SO glad that God knows my boys and what they need -- otherwise we would all be very confused.  What a joy to be a momma in these little days of diapers and discipline and tantrums and treasure hunts and tiny hands and curious questions.  What a priceless gift we have been given -- to nurture and love and treasure these babies, just like we are nurtured and loved and treasured by an incredible God.


Anonymous said...

I love this!!! Thanks for sharing a sweet post!


Baby Hancock said...

I totally relate to this! The more you think you know about parenting, the more you are humbled and realize it is only God that is the source of wisdom for raising them! You are a wonderful mom! Miss you!